Crazy homeless dude…

So I’m in the city the other day and this homeless guy comes up to me and starts talking to me.  I try to be a decent guy about it but it was definitely weird.  It’s winter and this guy is wearing sandals and he’s kinda freaking the kids out.  Not going nuts or anything but the whole “stranger-danger” thing, you know.

He was actually a nice guy and seemed pretty set even though he was obviously broke.  Never asked me for money which I was sorta waiting for any minute.  And he’s telling me about how he’s at peace, blah blah blah.  And I’m like, “At peace?  Dude, nothing personal but you look like you’re having a rough time of it here.  I don’t mean to be presumptuous but how are you at peace?”

So he tells me about his dad and all this stuff and to be honest I kinda wasn’t listening 100% but he’s definitely a lot less stressed about his situation than I would be.  You need a job bro!  I finally just broke down and asked him how he can be so chill under the circumstances, and he’s like, “What circumstances?”

Seriously.  Dude.  You’re obviously homeless.  Fine.  It had to be said so I said it.  And he’s like, “Oh that.  Yeah well it works out.  Never missed a meal yet.”

Never missed a meal yet?  What the hell?  Seriously?

So I figure I’ll test the guy.  I’m no angel but I do my best to be a decent guy and I guess you could say I play by the rules.  So I’m like, “So dude.  I have a good job.  Went to school.  Do an honest business and do right by my wife.  And I’m about ten times more stressed out than you are.  What’s the deal?  Hook me up.  What do I gotta do to chill out?”

So then the sales pitch hits.  I knew it!  Dude tells me to sell all my stuff.  Now I get it.  Sidewalk preacher.  Probably has a dozen of these “homeless dude” outfits that he throws on in the back of his Rolls Royce and heads out trolling for suckers.  No dice pal.  I’m not biting.

But now I’m pissed and I kinda can’t let it go.  “So you want me to sell my stuff and give you all the money?”

“No dude I don’t need your money.  I told you.  I’m good.  Never missed a meal, remember?”

Oh so I give it his “charity” I suppose, right?  Some charity that he just happens to run, etc. etc.  No.  He tells me, “Just give it to the poor or something.  I don’t know.  There’s always going to be poor folks.  Widows.  Kids with no parents.  Help them out. But this stuff you’ve got.  It’s not helping you at all.”

Not helping me??  What like my car?  My car?  That doesn’t help me get to work?  What an idiot.

Give it to the poor.  Like just find some random poor guy and give him all my stuff?  That’s crazy.  He’s like, “You’ll figure it out.  You figured out your job and your car and your family and your house.  I’m sure you can figure out who to help by selling all your stuff no problem.”

So obviously this guy was a complete whack job and I’m not getting that twenty minutes of my life back anytime soon.

Frickin’ nutcase.


And that, my friends, is how easy it is to reject Christ.

Go be awesome at something.  It’s what you were wired for.


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4 thoughts on “Crazy homeless dude…

  1. Nanci Haigler Flynn says:

    Exceptionally well put. Sometimes we get so hung up on seeing Jesus in his flowing robe and dusty sandals that we don’t see him at all when he’s wearing worn out shoes, ragged jeans and a greasy old leather jacket, so we also don’t hear him when he is saying the same stuff right now that he said when he was wearing robes.


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